Cold
by kkm46831
Summary: POST-NEW MOON, Bella never jumps, no Jacob, Edward doesn't come back. Bella reflects on her odd attraction to cold, better than it sounds. ONESHOT! R


DISCLAIMER: **I am not Stephenie Meyer, none of the characters belong to me. =]**

**COLD**

As the wind whipped through her hair, she closed her eyes, embracing the cold. Bella Swan had always been attracted to the cold. Of course, before she met him, she wouldn't have realized the irony in this. Yes, Bella Swan had always liked the cold, she thought with a grim look on her face.

"_Bella!" Her mother called, her voice shrill, worry creeping onto the edges, but as a seven year old, Bella didn't hear the panic in her voice as she skated around the ice._

_"Mom!" She yelled with excitement, her cheeks flushed pink. "Its like I'm flying!" _

_Her mother, though worried, smiled briefly, and looked outside, longing to go outside to the warmth, to get out of the ice rink they were currently at. She could never understand why Bella liked the cold so much. _

_Bella spun, giggling and smiling widely as she skated across the ice, twirling and jumping, she was graceful here. Here she didn't fall. Or, at least, that's what she thought, but with a light twirl, she stumbled, and in typical Bella Swam manor, fell on the ice._

_Renee took a deep breath, closing her eyes. She wasn't there to catch her, but it was okay, she thought with a sigh of relief, as Bella got up._

Bella clutched her books closer to her, walking swiftly to her next class. She was in college, she'd gotten into Dartmouth, and surprisingly, she'd gotten a full scholarship. It seemed suspicious to her, and she suspected how she got it, but Dartmouth was Dartmouth, and she couldn't pass up the opportunity, despite the fact that she was almost positive that the college was bribed. She doubted it was even legal, and she didn't understand why he did it. Bella closed her eyes, halting as a wave of pain hit her. "He doesn't care, he doesn't care, he doesn't care." She whispered, in a broken, strained voice. It was the only way that she could chase the hope away. Her angel was never coming back, never gracing her life with his presence.

She started to walk again, trying to get back to her brisk pace. She would just get to class, and back to her dorm, she had too much work for thoughts like that. Something cold and wet touched her cheek, and her large brown eyes raised to the sky. Snow had started to fall from the sky, and Bella smiled slightly, it felt unnatural to her, smiles hardly ever graced her features anymore. She pulled her coat closer to her body, embracing the temperature, it brought her comfort. She closed her eyes, getting lost in the cold.

_She grinned, gathering snow, tiny hands molding the frozen ice into a round ball. She threw it at him, a laugh escaping her full, red lips. Of course, he darted out of the way, she expected that, but time and time again, she threw snowballs at him. Each time he avoided it, until finally, after a pout graced her lips, she threw her final snowball, and it hit him square in the chest. A crooked smile graced his lips, and she bounded toward him, ready to throw her arms around his neck. But suddenly, Bella was airborne, and before she could even comprehend what happened, she was in his arms. Blushing, she cursed her own clumsiness, feeling even more inadequate and human. _

_He noticed her expression and frown, placing a freezing kiss to her cold cheek. "Smile, love." He requested. Looking up at him, she kissed him lightly, smiling at him pointedly. "I'm so clumsy." She complained._

_He laughed, his arms snaking around her waist as he pulled her close. "Well, it doesn't matter how many times you fall, I'll always catch you." He said, and Bella laughed, kissing him once again. _

She touched the flakes that landed on her coat, watching as they melted under her hands. She shook her head, biting down on her lips. It had been three years since that day in the forest, and she was able to remember some times they had together without the pain anymore. That was a happy memory, despite the fact that she had gotten a cold after that particular day. But she only let herself remember short, seemingly insignificant moments with him, though nothing was insignificant with him. Bella closed her eyes once more, her thoughts were taking a dangerous turn. "Doesn't care." She whispered, letting the pain wash over her for five short seconds before closing down her mind once more. She had to get to class, no time for memories, no time for wishful thinking.

As her skinny arms clutched her books to her, she walked forward, numbly, no longer pleased by the snow. She looked around, the campus was oddly empty, people must already be in class, she thought with an annoyed roll of her eyes. She was too slow, she had always been _too slow_. To slow to catch up to him, to slow to stop him from leaving her, but she thought, with a stab of pain in her chest, even if she had matched his speed, he wouldn't have stopped anyway. "Doesn't care." She said once more, angry that she couldn't stop thinking about him. She took a step, and suddenly, as she stepped on that particular patch of icy sidewalk, she lost her balance. The books fell out of her arms, and she was falling through the air.

Bella Swan wasn't scared though, because for that briefest instant, she believed what he had said. He would catch her, he promised to never let her fall. She'd forgotten the truth of the situation, that he was no longer there to catch her, because for the briefest second, Bella Swan believed that he would be there to catch her.

And then she hit the hard, icy sidewalk.

Yes, Isabella Swan had always liked the cold, but for a second, as she sat on the sidewalk, consumed in pain that had nothing to do with the fall, she realized that in the end, the cold always caused her some kind of pain.

**AN: This is my first story, and Its really not the best, but I'd appreciate it if you would review. Okay. I realize, that in the books, Bella actually hates snow and all of that, but this idea just popped into my head. I also realize that if Bella had gotten a scholarship to Darmouth, just out of the blue, she probably wouldn't accept it, being Bella. (Plus, a similar scenario happened in one of Stephenie Meyer's outtakes. **


End file.
